9 things I've learned about managing chaos during stressful times
+ a belated and abbreviated round-up of interesting things on my radar.
Hi friends.
I skipped a few weeks on Substack.
While that might not seem like a big deal—I had some very good reasons to temporarily deprioritize writing—it doesn’t feel great.
When I started writing On the Rise, I made a deal with myself. No matter how busy I got, no matter how many fire drills popped up, I was going to maintain consistency. I was going to publish once per week, even if it meant squeezing in writing at odd hours, or putting out a less-than-perfect product.
With writing, as with anything—consistency trumps perfection, every single time.
Mel Robbins’ POV on the importance of keeping promises to yourself (short clip here if you’re not familiar) has always resonated with me. Discipline is like a muscle—it can be developed and strengthened over time. One of the easiest ways to do that is to simply follow-through on your word to yourself.
All that being said, I can’t control the events of the past few weeks that kept me from writing. I can only commit to doing better moving forward. So here I am, on a redeye flight, typing away. Jet lag be damned.
Given the preamble, it’s probably no surprise that a big topic on my mind recently has been how to manage chaos.
No matter who you are, or what your profession is, you’ve experienced challenging times. Weeks, maybe months, when it feels like everything is an uphill battle. When fires are popping up faster than you can put them out, and your to-do list is so impossibly long that you don’t even know where to begin.
The past few weeks have been like that for me.
It’s been an extraordinarily busy time at work, even by start-up standards. And the pressure is on. It’s the most important time of the year to execute flawlessly—seasonal sales contribute to more than half of Juliet’s annual revenue (we are a *perfect gift* after all, according to everyone from Food & Wine to Forbes).
Couple that with a medical procedure and a 2-week trip abroad (including my first vacation of the year and some very overdue wedding planning), and it’s the perfect recipe for chaos.
This is not the first time I’ve felt overwhelmed, and it certainly won’t be the last.
I was reminded of that recently, during an impromptu dinner with a former-colleague-turned-dear-friend. It was one of those perfect New York nights, perched at the bar of Via Carota, reminiscing about old times over pasta and one-too-many glasses of Vermentino (PSA - it’s the cool girl’s Sancerre).
Our conversation turned to our time working together at Vogue (during the “Devil Wears Prada” golden age of magazine publishing). The impossible work load. The sky-high standards. The responsibility that came with the privilege of working on a world-famous, heritage brand. It was my second job out of college, and I was just so green. I remember struggling to stay afloat, vacillating between panic and paralysis, while the women around me handled the job with steely grace, poise and competency.
Looking back, I realize how far I’ve come. How much more adept I am today at meeting chaos with composure. I’ve even been told a handful of times over the years that staying cool-headed in a crisis is one of my greatest strengths.
So how exactly did that happen? What specific things did I learn? While there’s no silver bullet, upon reflection, there are definitely a few key practices that help me stay afloat when the going gets tough:
Ruthless prioritization
I’ve become really adept at identifying my top priorities (I use a modified version of the Eisenhower Matrix) and temporarily pausing everything else. Like really pausing—sans guilt or apologies. This often means telling other people “no” and flat out deleting some tasks. This is easier said than done when you have a constant stream of requests in your email / slack / text inbox, but it’s necessary if you want to avoid task paralysis and get the important stuff handled.
Clear communication
That being said … I *try* not to ghost people. No matter how busy I am, I can manage 30 seconds to explain what I am dealing with. I’ll admit, this is easier for me than some because I’m an inbox-zero-person anyways, but a quick “I’m dealing with some time sensitive priorities, will get back to you soon” buys some time without ruffling feathers.
Only try to control the controllables
No explanation needed. This is always a solid stoic tip to keep in mind, but during chaotic times, it has the added benefit of lightening the mental load.
Use the 24 hour rule before any charged emails / meetings / calls
Emotions are heightened during stressful times, and personally, I’m not always thinking with a clear head. There is no better time to embrace this rule to avoid saying (or emailing) something I’ll regret when things have calmed down.
Chip away at an impossibly long to-do list, one thing at a time
I used to get so overwhelmed by the amount of tasks on my plate that I would just avoid doing any of it (which is counterintuitive, but actually quite common). Now, I take it one task at a time, usually splitting my to-do list into smaller, daily lists so I’ve achieved something at the end of each day. I’ve found that intentionally creating a sense of momentum is energizing (can’t take credit for this insight - thank you Sam Altman).
Support system = sacred
Do I feel like I have time for family and friends during particularly busy times? No. But I’ve found that making space for loved ones, even just a little bit each day, lifts my spirits and keeps me sane. A 15 minute catch-up call with my parents or quick meal with my fiancé (I have to eat anyways, right?) can make a difference.
Keep the foundation strong
When I’m busy, I’ve found that prioritizing physical health helps maintain mental clarity. The way I see it, if the pressure is on, you just can’t afford to underperform. A half-day hangover or mild head cold from being run down can feel untenable when you have a lot on your plate. My non negotiables— eating healthy (no guilty pleasure gluten!), moderating my wine intake (one glass per night max), and carving out a little bit of time for movement each day.
Maintain a sense of perspective
A girl I knew in college used to say “even on my ugliest day, I’m still prettier than most people on campus”. Arrogant? Probably. But the saying really stuck with me. My grown-up version of that is—even on my worst days, I’m still luckier than most people in this world. Simply put, I have a lot to be grateful for, and it helps to remind myself of that during tough times.
Know it will pass
Crazy times come and go. Just take a deep breath, stay heads down, and keep going. It will pass and you’ll be stronger and better for the experience.
Next up, a handful of interesting things on my radar (shorter than usual, because, see above), and I’m punting my usual wine reco to a longer round-up later this week. ⬇️
xAllison
Welcome to On the Rise—weekly musings on founder life, navigating the business world, and women's empowerment from award-winning entrepreneur Allison Luvera, Co-Founder & CEO of Juliet. Subscribe (for free!) today.
On My Radar:
Babies on statutes: I got such a kick out of this clever campaign from The Dad Shift. In an effort to raise awareness for UK paternity leave policies and advocate for more paid time off for new fathers, they strapped baby dolls to famous male statues throughout the country.
Hyper-consumerism and curation are on the rise: This is a trend I’m watching closely, both as a consumer and entrepreneur. I think we have just started to scratch the surface of a shift in behaviors that will impact social media, traditional media, AI and retail immensely (Forerunner seems to agree).
Food for thought: Beyoncé launched SirDavis, a whisky in collaboration with LVMH. She explained her motivation in a quote to GQ that I loved—
“I don’t waste my time on something unless I’m deeply passionate about it. If I don’t wake up thinking about it and I’m not going to sleep dreaming about it, it’s not for me.”
Disturbing news that didn’t get enough coverage: The Taliban’s updated Vice and Virtue laws were unveiled while I was traveling and I was surprised at the lack of coverage (and outrage) by Western media. It has been a topic of discussion at the UN General Assembly this week though, with 4 countries … and Meryl Streep … accusing the Taliban of violating CEDAW, previously ratified by the Afghani government.
I caved are read the book everyone has been talking about: I have friends that have literally cancelled plans because they couldn’t put ACOTAR down. It may be “fairy smut”, but I finally read the first book and 100% understand the hype (and subsequently went down a reddit rabbit hole of online fan casting).
Next up—Big Fan by Alexandra Romanoff. This will be the first read in our new Juliet Wine book club (join our newsletter or community slack for the announcement).
Founder Mode double standard: I didn’t quite understand the furor surrounding Paul Graham’s essay on “founder mode”, but did find the reaction from prominent female founders interesting. Unsurprisingly, most of them felt there was a double standard and as Whitney Wolfe Herd noted, she was “in founder mode for 10 years and got attacked for it every single day.”
Wischoff Ventures announces $50M fund: If you are interested in the inner-workings of Venture Capital, Nichole Wischoff is an amazing woman to follow (personally I love her TikToks). She gives ongoing commentary on fundraising, investing, and managing her own funds that is refreshingly candid and educational.
AI can help SBE: NY Times wrote an interesting piece on what is by far the most interesting application of AI to me—unpacking how it can accelerate productivity and efficiency in start-ups. Productivity (for those not super in-tune with macroeconomics) is arguably the most critical factor influencing a nation's economic growth and standard of living, making AI's potential role in SBE noteworthy.
Still loving the trend of female entrepreneurs buying their companies back: Cassandra Grey is the latest, buying Violet Grey back from Coupang and FarFetch.
What I’m Drinking:
This week? Nothing. But I had some spectacular wine experiences in England and Mallorca, enough to warrant their own dedicated round-up. More to come.
That’s it for now—see you next week later this week! ✨